Acceptance
by Demented Koneko
Summary: Before Sakura and Syaoran's wedding, Meiling and Tomoyo reflect on the people most dear to them.


**Disclaimer: **In no shape or form do I own the rights to Cardcaptor Sakura. It belongs to the lovely ladies of CLAMP.

**Acceptance**

The dark haired woman gave a soft sigh as she absent-mindedly ran her fingers against the top of her glass that sat before her. She isn't quite sure why she's even here. Sure, she's been here a few times before with her friends from college, but other than that there's no reason to come to this place, especially not by herself.

The bar wasn't particularly fancy, however it wasn't exactly a dump either, and apart from a few people spread out in the booths behind her, the place was pretty much empty.

From glancing at the clock on the wall she knew she should leave but can't quite bring herself to move her body to stand up. She'd almost finished her drink and while she doesn't really want another one, it would appear odd sitting there at the bar for any length of time without one.

"I'm so pathetic," she thought to herself. "My best friend is getting married in two day and I'm sat here feeling sorry for myself. This isn't like me at all."

"Excuse me, would you mind if I join you?" she heard a voice ask.

"Sure, what-" She stopped suddenly realising that the person had been speaking in Japanese. Quickly turning around she saw her old friend standing there. "To-Tomoyo-san!"

"It's been awhile, hasn't it Meiling-chan?" The other woman said with a smile.

"What are you doing here?"

"Why, I'm here for Sakura-chan and Syaoran-kun's wedding of course." she replied with a small laugh, and Meiling couldn't help but feel slightly stupid.

"I, uh, actually meant what are you doing in this place." She said, using her hands to gesture that she was talking about the bar.

"You're looking well." Apparently Tomoyo had chosen to ignore her.

"You too. I like your hair." answered Meiling. While Tomoyo's hair had once reached all the way down her back, it now rested a few inches below her shoulders.

"Thank you. I found it difficult to maintain with all the travelling I've been doing lately for work so I thought that just for now it would be nice to have a change."

"I bet Sakura was surprised when she saw it. You know what's she like."

"Oh, I only landed in Hong Kong a few hours ago so I haven't actually seen Sakura-chan yet."

"Really?" Meiling questioned, truly surprised. "I figured you would want to get to the Li mansion as soon as possible." Just like when they were kids, Tomoyo was still obsessed with who she referred to as 'the eternally adorable Sakura-chan' so she had automatically assumed that the other woman would sought out her best friend straight away

"There's plenty of time for that later. Now, how about we go sit over there?" she asked, pointing to the booths in the back. "It'll give us a good chance to catch up."

With a small nod Meiling agreed. "Sure, why not?"

Ordering some drinks they sat down and started to chat. It had been almost a year since Meiling had last saw Tomoyo so they had plenty to discuss. Meiling was currently attending college while Tomoyo was a representative for her Mother's toy company, which meant that she was required to travel a lot. She also did fashion design and had recently won an award for her often bizarre but ultimately beautiful outfits. Not surprisingly she got Sakura to model in them as often as she possibly could. Really, it's wasn't unexpected that she hadn't seen Tomoyo in so long. For such a young woman, she sure was busy.

As such, time went by quickly, and before they knew it, they found that they had been sat talking for over three hours.

"Ah! Is that the time?!" Meiling exclaimed, glancing at the clock on the wall. "Syaoran and Sakura haven't been waiting for you have they?"

"Oh. It's fine. I wasn't actually supposed to arriving until tomorrow morning but I finished my work earlier than expected and was able to get an earlier flight."

"Oh well, I guess if they're not expecting you until tomorrow then it's alright. But I'm surprised. I would have thought you'd go see Sakura straight away."

"I do want to see Sakura-chan. Very much so. But I also wanted to see you too, Meiling-chan." She spoke sincerely.

Meiling's eyes widened slightly. "Tomoyo-san…"

"It's difficult to believe that my best friend is getting to married tomorrow. I suppose you're in the same position too, Meiling-chan."

"Hmm. Tomorrow, Syaoran will be someone's husband… Sakura, she'll officially become part of the Li clan."

"Li Sakura, huh? It does sound very cute!" Tomoyo declared gleefully.

A bead of sweat ran down the side of Meiling's face. "Something's never change, do they?"

"I suppose it is rather late." said Tomoyo looking at her own watch. "And I still need to book a hotel."

"A hotel? I thought you were staying at the main Li house?"

"Tomorrow I am. But since I came a day early and it is rather late, I fear it would be rude of me turn up just now."

"That's not good at all! You can't stay at a hotel!" Meiling cried out loudly.

"Meiling-chan…"

As a few people turned around to stare, the dark haired girl felt her face redden.

"S-Sorry!" she called, quickly sitting down. "Anyway, I won't let you stay in some crummy hotel, You can come stay at mines."

"But-"

"No buts! Besides, you can consider it returning the favour of letting me stay at your place that time." she said with a wink.

"Well, if you really don't mind, then I suppose it would be rude of me to refuse." Tomoyo replied with a smile.

********************************************************************

As it turned out, Meiling had moved out of the Li estate when she started college, citing that she wanted some independence. So she now had her own apartment. It was nearer the college she attended but not too far from the Li estate.

"Your parents must have been sad when you left." said Tomoyo while standing out of the way as Meiling unlocked the door to her apartment.

"Of course they were. But, you know, I needed my own space. Plus, you know, to the elders, it didn't matter if I was there or not."

Meiling had been one of the few children from the Li clan born without any magical abilities and while she said it didn't bother her, Tomoyo could tell from conversations past that it tore her up inside.

"The elders will be happy if Syaoran marries Kinomoto-san." She had told Tomoyo on that night so many years ago when Syaoran had confessed to her that he loved Sakura. "The future head of the Li clan and the new Master of the Clow cards? It's like they hit the jackpot. They'll finally get their wish to revive the magic of the Li clan. After all, I was no good. I was useless to them."

This was the first time Tomoyo had been in Meiling's apartment. It wasn't too big or too small. Comfortable was the word that came to her mind.

"Your apartment is very nice." she commented.

"Thanks. I try my best to keep it tidy. Plus my Mum's a complete clean freak and if she ever came over and found the place a mess, she'd kill me." Meiling replied, scratching her head nervously. "Oh, I'll put some clean sheets in the guest room!"

She quickly ran off and returned to find Tomoyo staring intently at a photograph of them along with Sakura and Syaoran from when they were children.

"Wow, that photo must be about eight years old now." said Meiling breaking the silence.

"Yes, and now after all this time, Sakura-chan and Syaoran-kun are finally getting married. I really can't wait. I'm sure the ceremony will be beautiful, and I'm dying to see Sakura-chan in the dress I made for her. I also-"

She stopped suddenly, noticing the melancholic look on her friend's face. "It's alright to be sad." she said softly.

"Huh? What? I'm not sad! I…I'm really happy for Syaoran. For both of them. It's just…" She paused. Just what? Why did her heart ache whenever she thought about it? Whenever she pictured Syaoran and Sakura happily married in her mind?

"It's so strange," she admitted as she took a seat on the couch. "Syaoran and Sakura, they've been together for years now, and I've been happy for them, I really have. After all, they deserve it. But now…now that they're getting married, I…" Tears began to well up in her eyes. "Syaoran, he's always been the person I've cared about most; as a cousin, as a fiancé, as my best friend. But never, never have I been the person that most mattered to him." The tears were now streaming down her face. "And now, now that he's getting married to the person that matters most to him, I…I'll never have the chance to be that person."

"I'm selfish, so damned selfish, I know. And I know I should be cheering him on. I'm his best friend for Gods sake, and still I can't help but feel like this. It's like I'm loosing him all over again."

"Meiling-chan…"

"I feel so stupid! I promised myself that I would never cry over Syaoran again and yet here I am. I'm such an idiot."

"It's not your fault." Tomoyo said sympathetically, or perhaps empathetically, as she handed her friend a small handkerchief. "We can't help how we feel. Love is an overpowering emotion, one that cannot be discarded easily. For some of us, we'll be in love with that person until the day that we die, even if they don't love us back."

Meiling's eyes widened slightly, realisation sinking in. "It's true, isn't it? You really are in love with Sakura."

Tomoyo merely nodded. "I always thought so." Meiling replied, wiping her eyes with the handkerchief. "You're so devoted to her, and your eyes light up whenever she's around. You must love her very much."

"Yes. Like Syaoran-kun is to you, Sakura-chan, she is my most important person."

"But you don't seem sad. Shouldn't you be upset that the person you love is getting married to someone else?"

"A part of me is, but I've discovered that if the person I love is happy then everything will definitely be alright."

"Tomoyo…"

"I understand how you feel, Meiling-chan. And there are times when deep down I want to cry too. But I know someone very close to me who wasn't able to be with the one they loved either. And because that person was so overcome with grief they couldn't stand to even be around the person they loved. They stayed away and it was only when the person they loved passed away did they realise how stupid they had been. 'If only I could have just been happy for them,' they said, 'so much wasted time', and 'now I'll never see their beautiful smile ever again.'"

"That…That's so sad."

"Yes. That's why even if I can't be with Sakura-chan in the way I would like, I still want to be around her as much as possible. If I see her smile I know she's happy and as a result that makes me happy."

"Even when you were a kid, you were so mature and it still surprises me." Meiling chuckled softly. "I guess in the end we're both cursed. Still, it's comforting to know that I'm not that only one."

"That's true." agreed Tomoyo.

"The person I love is in love with the person you love. How confusing." The dark haired girl sighed.

"Well, they say that love rarely makes sense."

"That's for sure. Still, I guess as long as Syaoran is happy…"

Yes, as long as Syaoran was happy, everything would – even if not for her – definitely be alright.

* * *

**Authors Notes: **When I first started writing this fic, I had orginally intended it to be Meiling/Tomoyo. However, in the end it didn't work out that way. Oh well, I'll hopefully get aroud to writing a Meiling/Tomoyo fic someday.

Anyway, thank you very much for reading. Constructive criticism and any advice on how I can improve are greatly appreciated.


End file.
